I wrote this blog while I was on a mini-getaway. Upon arrival to my destination I posted the above graphic on my social media pages. A few friends contacted me and shared that they were going to follow my lead and take a break in order to practice self-care.
For me, this was not merely a social media break, rather a break from what many call “adulting.” After a wonderfully, celebratory homegoing service and burial of my mother, two days later an intense feeling of exhaustion overtook me. It wasn’t just that I was physically tired, but my mind was truly exhausted.
Although I went back to work within days and returned to active ministry service, inside I was just plain tired. Perhaps it was six years of being a caregiver, which had come to an abrupt halt. A sorority sister who had been in a similar situation told me that she did not realize how tired she was until after her mother had made her transition from this life. In many situations while caring for a loved one, the caregiver simply consumes themselves with the responsibility of fulfilling their duties. The sudden end of the caregiver lifestyle brings it’s own set of difficulties.
I promised the Bishop who eulogized my mother along with some of my closest friends that I would take a break. I realized that my effort to return to “life” so quickly as I worked to establish my life’s new normal, had actually done me a disservice as far as the long haul is concerned. In order to move forward, it was necessary for me to be honest with myself. I had to put myself on the sidelines for a period of time.
Oftentimes African Americans, particularly women fail to take time off simply to regroup. However I’m reminded of the time that Jesus got away, taking only his closest disciples with him.
During those few days, I read a book. I slept longer than I have in months. Lastly, I did something that I’ve never done and went to a salt cave for Himalayan salt spa treatment. Yes, it was wonderful, and I have sought a similar venue at home.
I share all of this with you, not for any pity or need for anyone to feel bad for me. Not at all! I am hereby giving you permission to think about the often forgotten person in your life – you! Close up the shop for a few days. Rediscover yourself – your likes, your passion. By all means, try something new and come back stronger! Take it from me, you will not regret it!
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